Neal Stephenson passage

I am not sure why this amuses me so much, but in Neal Stepheson's "Quicksilver" William Penn addresses a character, Daniel Waterhouse thusly

I am chagrined, appalled, mortified that you are here! You are not welcome, Brother Daniel, you are a problem, and obstacle, and if I were not a pacifist I would beat you to death with a rock.

Probably just the image of a Quaker saying that does the trick.